The Sensuality Snare, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Cranium

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating dilemma and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women utilize sex to get love, and men utilize love to get sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where singles interpret great sex as love. But those who fall under the Sex Trap go even farther due to the fact that for these singles, making love carries tremendous significance and consequences.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they believe sex is a necessary test of compatibility, (if the sex is great then the relationship will be good also).

B.more commonly, all awareness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed songs consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual might be a match on levels other than physical destination-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to keep in touch with reality when all those hormones are running wild. Our body responds to somebody we are attracted to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), which makes the opportunity to have sex with someone we are drawn in to very tough to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce emotions), which makes us feel very close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are strong and uncontrolled , causing powerful sensations of attraction, excitement, love, wellness, and nearness .

When issues develop, those who fall into the Sex Trap typically rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, but the sex is great!" They most likely would not admit it, but they prioritize physical intimacy and concern the rest as optional. Their primary searching tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mainly with gay males, says that many of his clients have actually fallen under the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys specifically in cosmopolitan areas, sex is readily available, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to be good?".

North includes, "I think this is a ' man' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do desire to mention that chemistry is very important. Yet, anonymous chemistry is a provided that we can't manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it must be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry take place, though often it can grow over time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and truth hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you need to balance your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with typical sense. While great sex is important for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner options by paying complete focus on your vision, objectives, requirements, and worths -- while feeling all those amazing stimulates!

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